Thirty day Challenge.... Day... Ugh... does it even matter

So the thirty day challenge was just that, a challenge, and I failed it, as I expected I would. I haven't been keeping up with much recently, I feel like life is getting harder and harder to get things done. I got a job YAY but it seems like I am getting limited hours, so I think I have to find a second job.

I failed at the thirdy day challenge in a BIG way. Seriously though. I didn't even make it halfway through. Kind of an euphamism for my life. I usually give up half wayt hrough for the things that don't matter as much to me. There are things that do matter to me that i know I will never give up on....

1) My family, as much as I have malice towards certain people in my family, I will never give up on them. Even when every inch of my being is telling me to just quit thinking about them and let it go, I can't.... most people should know right now that I am talking about my dad. My sisters, oh gosh, what do I say about them, they are my whole world. We NEVER talk, well mary adn I do sometimes, and Wanda and I have sporadic, short, yet meaningful conversations.... but I love them more than life itself... I love them more than chocolate milk! My mom, SHE IS A GODDESS! She is the epitomy or perfection, ok maybe not that perfect but to me she is my everything. She and I probably talk the least, but I swear she is telepathic, she can always call right at the right moment, it's her mom power.

2) My husband, Robert means more to me than I can ever explain. I will never be able to put into straight words what he means to me and to my life. I joked with him, when we first started dating, I had NOOOOOO intention of ever getting serious with him, I was just making friends. Then BOOM a year later we are married. Really funny thing, is that most of his family thought we were pregnant and that's why we wanted a speedy wedding. HAH! I still wonder how many of them really thought we were active!?! SOOO, between, my husband and my mom and sisters technically my heart should explode. Yet, there is still a little room for a kid in my life.

3) Myself, as much as I think about it and as much as I know I should sometimes quit trying stuff. I know that just giving up will get to me. I know that I am amazing and super duper smart and that I can do so much, but sometimes I have other things on my plate. Like going to school, right now it's a goo after thought and I think that I could do it one day, it just seems like I always have too much going on to even think about that as a feasible option. I need to just set it in stone and DO IT! But what do I go to school for...

4) My friends, you know who you are, and most of you don't even read my blogs, funny thing is I know that most of you won't read my blogs. But there are a select few that I would lay my life on the line for... seriously, once I reach that point of trust, it never goes away. One person that I love above all other friends is Amanda, if she called em tomorrow and said she really needed me to come back to Texas, I would be there in an instant. She knows that she can ask anything of me and it will be taken care of. She is a sister to me. My other friends might have to do a hairs worth of convincing to get me to come back at the drop of a hat! ;) I love my friends, they are what keep me sane and grounded.

I need to add one more thing to this list, but it's me having faith to take care of it.... my weight... I found out on Sunday, I have gained 15 POUNDS since I lost my job. Seriously, I was already overweight but now there is another 15 POUNDS! I need to seriously buckle down and start trying to lose... I know I am beautiful, I still get hit on by guys and stuff, but still... I never pictured in my mental image of me as fat, now with these 15 pounds, my mental image is HUGE! GEEZE... 15 POUNDS! So, I don't want to start a weight loss blog, but I am going to start a challenge, anyone that reads this and sees me eating unhealthy food, STOP ME! Remind me of my 15 POUNDS, and remind me that I need to lose weight. Don't stop me from eating just stop me from eating crap that will just make me gain weight again.